One of the most common things surrogate applicants say during intake calls is:
“Why are there SO many questions?” 😂
And honestly… that’s completely fair.
Sometimes our intake calls can feel like a first date, a medical interview, and a therapy session all combined together. We ask about your pregnancies, your family, your support system, your lifestyle, your delivery history, your mental health history, your relationship, your schedule, your insurance… and sometimes applicants wonder if they are being judged or interrogated.
But the truth is: every single question has a reason behind it.
Most of the questions we ask are actually there to protect YOU.
One of the first and most common questions we hear is:
“Will the baby be genetically related to me? Will it use my egg?”
And first of all — this is NOT a stupid question.
Years ago, traditional surrogacy existed, where the surrogate also used her own eggs. But today, almost all journeys are gestational surrogacy. That means the embryo already belongs to the Intended Parents and/or their chosen egg or sperm donor. The surrogate is not genetically related to the baby.
The IVF clinic will transfer a PGT-A tested embryo into your uterus and hope it implants successfully. This process is called embryo transfer. If everything goes well, you carry the pregnancy just like your own pregnancies, but biologically, the baby is not yours.
Another common concern we hear is:
“What protections do surrogates actually have?”
Many women are interested in surrogacy, but they are also scared because they do not know what they will go through, what role they play in the process, or how they will be treated. The good news is that surrogacy in the United States is heavily structured with legal protections.
Before anything medical even starts, both the Intended Parents and the surrogate will sign a legal contract. The Intended Parents have their own attorney, and the surrogate also has her own independent attorney representing HER interests. The contract covers compensation, travel, communication expectations, medical responsibilities, delivery preferences, and many important “what if” situations. Everything is discussed openly before transfer happens.
Surrogates are not “employees.” They are protected participants in the journey.
Another question we sometimes hear is:
“If I’m medically and psychologically cleared, does that mean I can match with any Intended Parents?”
The answer is: not always, because surrogacy is not only medical — it is also deeply legal.
Many people outside of the industry do not realize that surrogacy laws are completely different depending on the state. Some states are very surrogacy-friendly, while others have restrictions involving international Intended Parents, LGBTQ+ couples, or single Intended Parents.
For example, Texas has strict requirements for Intended Parents and is generally more favorable toward married couples. Some states remain legally unclear or “neutral” regarding surrogacy, which means attorneys must carefully evaluate every case individually. California remains the most surrogacy-friendly state in the United States because it has the longest legal history supporting surrogacy, LGBTQ+ families, international Intended Parents, and single parents.
This also leads to another common misunderstanding about agency licenses and qualifications. Years ago, when I first started browsing Reddit and Facebook surrogate groups, I saw people accusing agencies of being “fake” simply because they did not have a New York license. In reality, only agencies working with New York surrogates are legally required to hold a New York surrogacy license. Outside of New York, most states do not require a specific surrogacy agency license to operate. We strictly follow those legal requirements, which is why we rarely work with NYC surrogates at the moment. When we do, we often refer them to trusted friends and agencies already licensed there while our own application remains under review.
Another major part of intake calls involves preference questions.
We usually ask applicants things like:
Are you comfortable working with married couples? LGBTQ+ couples? Single parents? International Intended Parents? HIV-positive Intended Parents using sperm washing?
Some applicants feel nervous answering these questions because they worry they might sound rude or judgmental if they say no. But surrogacy is not about forcing people together. It is about finding a GOOD match, not simply the fastest match.
It is completely okay to have boundaries and preferences.
Even after a match call, surrogates still have the right to say no. Your comfort matters too. Your voice matters just as much as the Intended Parents’ voice because surrogacy is a long emotional journey for BOTH sides.
And finally, let’s talk about two questions that sometimes surprise surrogate applicants during intake calls:
“Would you feel comfortable working with Intended Parents who are HIV or Hepatitis-B carriers?”
“Would you feel comfortable carrying a mosaic embryo?”
Many applicants feel nervous when hearing these questions for the first time, but most of the fear comes from not understanding the medical process behind them.
For Intended Parents who are HIV positive, modern reproductive medicine is far more advanced than many people realize. Through a process called sperm washing, fertility doctors separate healthy sperm cells from the seminal fluid before creating embryos through IVF. The embryos are also carefully tested before transfer, including PGT-A genetic testing in many cases. This means the process is designed to greatly minimize medical risk for the surrogate.
In some situations, surrogates may need additional medications or injections before transfer to further increase immune protection and safety precautions. Because of those extra steps, Intended Parents will usually provide additional compensation or bonuses to the surrogate as part of the legal agreement.
Another term applicants often hear is “mosaic embryo.” A mosaic embryo means that during genetic testing, some cells appeared normal while some showed abnormalities. It is considered a “gray area” embryo — not fully abnormal, but not fully normal either. Many mosaic embryos still result in healthy pregnancies and healthy babies, but they may come with slightly lower success rates or require additional monitoring during pregnancy.
And just like every other part of surrogacy, carrying a mosaic embryo is always YOUR choice. Some surrogates are comfortable with it, and some are not. There is no right or wrong answer. Our job during intake is not to pressure anyone — it is simply to understand your comfort level so we can help create the safest and best possible match for everyone involved.
That is exactly why we created Yunda Surrogate 101 — to make surrogacy feel less mysterious, less scary, and more transparent for the women who are considering this journey.
Education removes fear. And informed surrogates make stronger, safer journeys.
